You Can't Run Forever!!

A dog that bites, your mom when she was angry, an oncoming car, a dodgeball when you were a kid, a person, a memory, a town.

What do these things have in common?

Go back and read them again and then think. I'll give you a few seconds.

Okay, answer. They are all things from which we run. Things that can possibly hurt us. Things that cause pain.

I remember when my sister was little and she got bit on the arm by a friend's dog. It didn't hurt her, she was barely grazed, but the fear that struck her when that dog came toward her was enough to cause her to run each time she saw a dog coming. Same with our mom, when she was angry about anything, we would take off. LOL. It didn't do much good, she eventually caught up with us. Each of the things listed above can hurt you if they hit you just right.

I was faced with a couple of those things recently and it wasn't pretty.

No, it wasn't a dodgeball or an oncoming car (much to the chagrin of my enemies, lol), but rather a person and some memories. Something I thought I would run from forever. To say that I hate this person would have been a statement that I would have agreed with a while back. But now, as I type tonight, I have to say that I don't hate him. I hate what he did, but not him.

I know, I know. I sometimes relate it as if I do, and some days I really felt that deep, horrible emotion for him. But after seeing him again, I did some thinking about it all. Do I hate him or what he was doing at the time?

I hate what he was doing.

To hate someone means that you wish them ill will and harm. And that's not what I want to happen to him. Why, you might ask after all he did to me and my son?

Well, because I know in my heart and truly believe the verse from the Bible that says vengeance belongs to God and He will repay. I honestly think that whatever we sow, we reap and so although I wish him no ill will, I know that God will deal with him and his heart when the time comes.

I also realized something recently while I was faced with seeing this person. I realized that we can run as fast and as far as our feet will take us. We can go as far as we want to get away from a town or a person or a memory, only to find that they are still present with us in our minds. We might move our physical bodies somewhere else, but the memories of what happened will be forever present and do lasting damage unless and until we deal with them.

So, what do you do to deal with them? Stop running.

I'm no expert. I'm not a psychologist or anything like that, but I can tell you what I did. I faced them head on.

Will you be scared? Yes, you will. Will you cry? Yes, you will. But you will eventually stop crying and being scared. You will see that the memory of what happened and what that person represents is far worse then dealing with it up front.

Don't be like me. Don't push it all down somewhere and develope hatred for that person because you can't deal with what happened. Face it head on. Think about it, cry about it and move beyond it.

Fear will kill you. Stress will kill you. I've found recently that there's no reason to keep things bottled up inside when you can deal with them and go on with your life. It's painful to remember it all. I know that first hand. But I also know first hand that it does more damage to run from it and push it down somewhere. The lasting effects are dangerous to your health.

So tonight, examine yourselves like I did. Maybe you will have to face the person or maybe just the memory, but either way, make sure that you take the time needed to come to a place of peace in your mind, because until you do, you're going to be fifty shades of messed up. Take it from someone who knows.

This blog was kind of vauge and not my typical one, but hopefully you found something of value in it.

I'm soooo tired. I've left out early this morning on my trip and I'm just now getting settled in. So goodnight and God bless. Forgive and move on. I'm learning that very lesson as well. I love you all so much.

Continued prayers tomorrow and we go to our meeting.

Remember to work hard and Dream Big!!

Much love,

Christy